a caterpillar’s experience

As time passes, with every day, i notice that the growing inner-silence within me creates a filter through which my mind refocuses its perceptions and consciousness to recognize its True Self.  Last night while attending a birthday dinner for my grandchild Ava, i discovered that i was changing in a very elemental manner.  It was very much like having a caterpillar’s experience of becoming a butterfly. 

We drove up to the restaurant “Islands” with the Ava and Ori and while Rita was parking the car we went in looking for our table.   All at once i was immersed in a ocean of loud noises and high energetic activities coming from every direction.   On the ride over the energy was present as usual but now there was two distinct experiences and it was confusing at first.

After i was seated the energy began to intensify and it engulfed me.  It felt like i was in a cocoon of silence in the midst of a hurricane of sounds, activity, laughter, and joy.  i heard all the noise but now it didn’t feel like noise anymore.  It was now a welcomed guest, not an intruder, to my senses.

This experience was very similar to an earlier post when i described how i watched the extreme violence in the movie “deadpool” and wasn’t emotional moved.  Except in this case it was auditory.

i looked around the table as the conversations dug in and felt a sense of security, like i was home, watching everyone lovingly.  This scene could have been my living room; there was no distinction between the home i felt inside me now and the home where i sleep.

i became aware of how i seemed invisible.  No one seemed to engage me nor i them.  i’ve always interpreted that as a fault of mine before but now something has changed and i don’t care any more.

To be completely honest i didn’t come to know how a caterpillar transforms itself into a butterfly until 5 years ago.  The idea that its metamorphosis came about by a elemental transformation of most of its cells is a testimony to nature’s power; supernatural at best.

Like the butterfly, i feel the energy digest my sense of self only to be re-awakened to a higher functioning architecture or inner-silence that was lying subtly beneath the surface of my humanity.

buon appetito

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