i guess it’s only fitting that as i complete another solar spin i also consider the role that conviction is playing in my awakening.  One that would  demonstrate to my still tiny questioning mind that when comparing  conviction vs. distraction there is no doubt that conviction unites me with my essence while the identification with anything else distracts me from my goal.  

Early in my awakening i was experiencing the most exquisite bliss and energies but hadn’t quite owned it and in doing so i questioned its veracity and was unconsciously undermining its stability.  This exemplified the learning curve i was on.  Once my conviction in the process caught up to the experience it was like being thrown off the cliff of doubt and awakening to my birthright and yes… spiritual entitlement.

Last night the family came over to celebrate my birthday.  Whenever i begin to party there is that old “TM” voice that lingers in my mind whispering “if you drink it will keep your from transcending and hold you back from enlightenment.”  What nonsense!  i have learned to not believe that fading voice and so i jumped into the festivities whole heartedly.

One margarita and beer later (as you can see i’m not much of a drinker) i’m feeling the alcohol and enjoying the family, totally convinced that this is just one of many wonderful expressions of reality when all of a sudden my head starts to expand and my skull opens up with the blissful energy of the divine.

Immediately, as i always do, i welcome the energies with acceptance and declare my gratitude.  The only distinction now, from any other time, is that i recognize the alteration of the brain due to the alcohol.  It’s all the same and it’s all just perfect.  Never in my wildest imagination some 40 years ago would i have thought such a realization was possible.

For me the statement that “everything is perfect and purposeful” seemed unbelievable and out of reach until now…but now i have the conviction that this is absolutely true.

felice compleanno
edo

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